As a happily married, fifty-five-year-old professional woman, Susan had it all—or thought she did—until the day of her shocking diagnosis with stage IV Mantle Cell Lymphoma, a rare and aggressive disease. Ninety-eight percent of her bone marrow was cancerous, and a heart attack or brain aneurism was imminent. Within minutes of being admitted to the hospital, her beautifully ordinary life disappeared.



Facing a possible death sentence, Susan experienced visions so lucid and beautiful that she imagined she was looking into the foyer of death or a magnificent afterlife. Her mind and body melded into all that surrounded her. Bliss replaced all fear.



But during the darkest moments, Susan questioned the nature of mortality. Does death have the same shape, sound, and feeling for everyone? Did the father she yearned for think of her the moment he died? What would she think of? Would there be regret, celebration, or nothingness?



After months of grueling inpatient chemo, she faced another seemingly impossible hurdle. To live, she needed a stem cell transplant. But Johnny—her brilliant, off-the-grid brother—was the only possible donor. He hadn't been heard from in thirty years.