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Maybe I Don’t Belong Here

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What to expect

'As a Black British man I believe it is vital that I tell this story. It may be just one account from the perspective of a person of colour who has experienced this system, but it may be enough to potentially change an opinion or, more importantly, stop someone else from spinning completely out of control.' – David Harewood

This audio edition is read by the author, and includes an exclusive conversation between David Harewood and historian and writer David Olusoga.

Is it possible to be Black and British and feel welcome and whole?

Maybe I Don't Belong Here is a deeply personal exploration of the duality of growing up both Black and British, recovery from crisis and a rallying cry to examine the systems and biases that continue to shape our society.

In this powerful and provocative account of a life lived after psychosis, critically acclaimed actor, David Harewood, uncovers devastating family history and investigates the very real impact of racism on Black mental health.

When David Harewood was twenty-three, his acting career beginning to take flight, he had what he now understands to be a psychotic breakdown and was sectioned under the Mental Health Act. He was physically restrained by six police officers, sedated, then hospitalized and transferred to a locked ward. Only now, thirty years later, has he been able to process what he went through.

What was it that caused this breakdown and how did David recover to become a successful and critically acclaimed actor? How did his experiences growing up Black and British contribute to a rupture in his sense of his place in the world?

'Such a powerful and necessary read . . . Don't wait until Black History Month to pick up this book, it's a must-read just now.' - Candice Brathwaite, author of I Am Not Your Baby Mother

'David Harewood writes with rare honesty and fearless self-analysis about his experiences of racism and what ultimately led to his descent into psychosis . . . This book is, in itself, a physical manifestation of that hopeful journey.' - David Olusoga, author of Black and British

Critics Review

One of the best books on mental health, race, Britain and the thrill of acting I have ever read. You will fall in love with the miraculous David Harewood as he grows up, stumbles, falls and rises in triumph. This incredible, touching and inspiring story will change lives.
Stephen Fry
David Harewood writes with rare honesty and fearless self-analysis about his experiences of racism and what ultimately led to his descent into psychosis at the age of twenty-three. With equal candour, David plots the story of his recovery. This book is, in itself, a physical manifestation of that hopeful journey.
David Olusoga, author of Black and British
Heartwarming, eye-opening, gut-wrenching... Maybe I Don’t Belong Here shines a light on the interplay between race, identity and mental well-being with tremendous moral courage.
David Lammy, MP
I feel like I gained a friend in these pages. It’s a book that is written with honesty and humanity... I learned a little more about what it means to be black, a black man, a black British man who has struggled with mental health and grown as a result. It’s a testament to his resilience, vulnerability and humility that we can all learn from.
Jeffrey Boakye, author of Musical Truth, What is Masculinity?, and Black, Listed
Staggering . . . a harrowing read and one I’ll never forget.
The Guardian
Startling and thought-provoking
The Sunday Times
Such a powerful and necessary read...Don't wait until Black History Month to pick up this book, it's a must-read just now.
Candice Brathwaite, Sunday Times bestselling author of I Am Not Your Baby Mother and Sista, Sister
[Maybe I Don’t Belong Here ] is captivating... His fortitude and the courage to revisit that period and all it entailed are quietly heroic; hearing him tell his own story with such generosity makes this a memorable listen.
The Financial Times, 'Best Audiobooks Roundup' 
Anyone who has experienced racism will want to read this book. Anyone who hasn’t, really ought to
Hugh Quarshie
Brutally honest, brave and enlightening, David Harewood’s memoir and account of his breakdown is a fascinating read. Well-written and researched, this is a book that makes you wonder about our mental health system, about othering and racism in Britain and all the other black men who haven’t made it through to the other side. But it's also a love letter to Harewood’s friends, parents and a tribute to his determination to succeed against the odds.
Kit de Waal, author of My Name is Leon and The Trick to Time
This is an amazing book. Only an actor could capture the double-consciousness of being Black and British so beautifully. Playing a role while simultaneously trying to be true to yourself. For me this held both lessons and affirmations of what it means to be a Black British man and the struggles to reconcile our inherent contradictions.
Marcus Ryder MBE, author and chair of RADA
Illuminating and essential.
Ted Hodgkinson, chair of the International Booker Prize 2020
Unflinching. David Harewood’s book traces the effects of racial bigotry to a young boy growing up in 1970s Birmingham. Brave and incredibly honest.
Adrian Lester
One of the most powerful testimonies to the impact of racism I have ever read.
Kehinde Andrews, author of The New Age of Empire
In this deeply moving memoir, actor David Harewood examines the episodes of psychosis in his past. You feel his pain as he uncovers how he was treated not just as a mentally ill patient but also as a black man . . . As a black, working-class man with British and Caribbean heritage, Harewood often feels he doesn’t have a place. This book shows he very much does
The Style Life
A powerful memoir in which....Harewood recounts the psychotic episode he suffered in his 20s, what he learned from the experience and how he made the journey to recovery. In particular, Harewood came to understand the extent to which his psychosis and treatment were rooted in race, racism, and his sense of identity.
BBC
Demonstrates how those in the public eye can use their profiles to try and lever positive change . . . Immensely powerful.
The Bookseller

User Reviews

Book 5.0
Narration 5.0
Author David Harewood
Narrator David Harewood
Duration 8 hours and 42 minutes
Release Date
ISBN 9781529064162
Format Audiobook
Publisher Pan Macmillan
Genre Autobiography: arts and entertainment, Coping with illness and specific health conditions, Coping with mental health issues, Memoirs, Racism and racial discrimination
Collections Black & British
Availability GB, IE
Rating
5.0 (1 review)
Narration
5.0 (1 review)

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