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Revealing

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What to expect

Brought to you by Penguin.

Our goal should not be to eliminate vulnerability, but to harness its power. This is a roadmap for figuring out how.


We know the gut-wrenching feeling: that post-conversation replay, cringing at how much we just revealed. We live in fear of saying too much, so we keep quiet, guard our emotions and lock away our most personal thoughts.

But what if we’ve been worrying about the wrong thing?

A growing body of research shows we vastly underestimate the value of oversharing, with our spouses, friends, colleagues and even strangers. Vulnerability and openness can unlock some of life’s richest rewards: deeper friendships, stronger professional relationships, greater well-being and, yes, even love.

Drawing on over a decade of research and real-life stories, here behavioural scientist Leslie John explores why we hesitate to open up, when sharing really does backfire, and how to strike a balance between too much and too little.

Revealing empowers us to make smarter, bolder and more satisfying decisions about just how much we want to share and why.

‘Will change how you think about every decision to open up or hold back’ Katy Milkman

‘A fascinating look into how we can all communicate better’ Arthur C. Brooks

‘Unflinchingly honest, rigorously researched and funny to boot’ Ethan Kross

© Leslie K. John 2026 (P) Penguin Audio 2026

Critics Review

How do you know when sharing yourself is a priceless gift, and when it is an unwelcome burden? Revealing will show you how to answer this question. Essential for work, romance and family.
Kim Scott, bestselling author of Radical Candor
Witty, warm, and grounded in science, Revealing will change how you think about every decision to open up or hold back with friends, family, and colleagues. In this indispensable guide, John marshals fascinating research and unforgettable stories to demonstrate how sharing more can deepen trust and spark connection.
Katy Milkman, bestselling author of How to Change
Brilliantly researched and deeply human, Revealing brings groundbreaking science to life with riveting stories to show that gutsy reveals can pay off - and I loved every minute of it.
Annie Duke, bestselling author of Thinking in Bets
A fascinating look into why people reveal what they do about themselves - and how we can all communicate better with others.
Arthur C. Brooks, bestselling author of From Strength to Strength and Build the Life You Want
Unflinchingly honest, rigorously researched and funny to boot, Leslie John achieves rarefied air with Revealing. This is a book I wish I’d had twenty-five years ago - and one I’ll be recommending to everyone I know.
Ethan Kross, bestselling author of Shift and Chatter

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