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Seeing What Is There
- Author
- Erica Rex
- Narrator
- Elisabeth Rodgers
- Publisher
- Blackstone Publishing
- Publish Date
- 13 January 2026
- Run Time
- 9 hours 46 minutes
- Format
- Audiobook
What to expect
For fans of Aldous Huxley and Timothy Leary, a woman’s personal journey unfolds in a historically documented and scientifically elucidated memoir of lifelong struggle to overcome CPTSD with the help of psychedelics.
In 2009 following a breast cancer diagnosis, Rex found herself spiraling into a depression that led her to a groundbreaking clinical trial at Johns Hopkins University in 2012, where she was given two doses of psilocybin.
As she reflects on her tumultuous childhood marked by violent abuse from psychiatrist parents, Rex uncovers the psychological influences that shaped her life and therapeutic search. Her journey intersects with a dark history of psychological experimentation, including the work of Harvard’s Dr. Henry A. Murray—her mother’s mentor—whose controversial research influenced modern psychology and led to the psychopathology of Ted Kaczynski, the Unabomber.
Despite years of failed conventional treatments, Rex sought alternative paths, discovering transformative healing through ayahuasca, MDMA, and 5-MeO-DMT. Seeing What Is There navigates the complexities of the psychedelic therapy movement, questioning its ethical pitfalls and motivations. Ultimately, Rex demonstrates that true healing requires more than just pharmaceuticals—it demands economic security, community, and social support, offering a powerful meditation on trauma, survival, and the potential for transformation.
Critics Review
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“Exposes the dark heart of modern psychiatry and shows how the promise of psychedelic therapy is being subverted by ego-driven practitioners and pharmaceutical capitalism.”
Stephen Mills, author of Chosen: A Memoir of Stolen Boyhood
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“A mesmerizing combination of personal confession and deep scientific insights. Rex turns many expectations upside down and it is almost impossible to resist her reasoning and the personal voice she brings to it.”
Jeffrey Masson, psychoanalyst and author of The Assault on Truth
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“This important memoir critiques psychiatry and the psychedelic movement, exploring trauma, healing, and the ethical challenges of contemporary psychiatry…Students of psychedelics and psychiatry would do well to read this book.”
Joe Moore, cofounder and CEO of Psychedelics Today
User Reviews
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Details
- Author
- Erica Rex
- Narrator
- Elisabeth Rodgers
- Duration
- 9 hours 46 minutes
- Release Date
- 13 January 2026
- ISBN
- 9798228533820
- Format
- Audiobook
- Publisher
- Blackstone Publishing
- Genre
- Biography: science, technology and medicine, Memoirs
Synopsis
For fans of Aldous Huxley and Timothy Leary, a woman’s personal journey unfolds in a historically documented and scientifically elucidated memoir of lifelong struggle to overcome CPTSD with the help of psychedelics.In 2009 following a breast cancer diagnosis, Rex found herself spiraling into a depression that led her to a groundbreaking clinical trial at Johns Hopkins University in 2012, where she was given two doses of psilocybin.As she reflects on her tumultuous childhood marked by violent abuse from psychiatrist parents, Rex uncovers the psychological influences that shaped her life and therapeutic search. Her journey intersects with a dark history of psychological experimentation, including the work of Harvard’s Dr. Henry A. Murray—her mother’s mentor—whose controversial research influenced modern psychology and led to the psychopathology of Ted Kaczynski, the Unabomber.Despite years of failed conventional treatments, Rex sought alternative paths, discovering transformative healing through ayahuasca, MDMA, and 5-MeO-DMT. Seeing What Is There navigates the complexities of the psychedelic therapy movement, questioning its ethical pitfalls and motivations. Ultimately, Rex demonstrates that true healing requires more than just pharmaceuticals—it demands economic security, community, and social support, offering a powerful meditation on trauma, survival, and the potential for transformation.
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