Tell Me How to Be

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What to expect

26-year-old Akash Amin has everything he ever wanted, but as he tries to kickstart his songwriting career and commit to his boyfriend, he is haunted by the painful memories of the first boy he ever loved. When his mother tells him she is selling the family home, Akash returns to Illinois, hoping to finally move on.

Renu Amin always seemed perfect: doting husband, beautiful house, healthy sons. But as the one-year anniversary of her husband's death approaches, Renu can't stop wondering if she chose the wrong life thirty-five years ago .

Together, Renu and Akash pack up the house, retreating further into the secrets that stand between them. When their pasts catch up to them, Renu and Akash must decide between the lives they left behind and the ones they've since created.

By turns irreverent and tender, filled with the beats of '90s R&B, Tell Me How to Be is about our earliest betrayals and the cost of reconciliation. But most of all, it is the love story of a mother and son each trying to figure out how to be in the world.

Critics Review

  • A beautiful book about a mother and son…I really loved this book.

    Rumaan Alam, author of LEAVE THE WORLD BEHIND
  • I loved Tell Me How to Be’s story of family, first love, and figuring out your place in the world. Neel’s writing is vulnerable, authentic and entertaining. This book gives a fresh perspective to complicated family relationships…something everyone can relate to.

    Lilly Singh, author of HOW TO BE A BAWSE
  • A brilliant novel about mothers and sons, secrets and lies, regret and truth. Neel Patel writes with a clear, empathetic pen, creating a cast of characters that are utterly unforgettable.

    Nikesh Shukla, editor of THE GOOD IMMIGRANT
  • Once in a while there comes a book that reminds us of why we read: to feel, to question, to grow. This is that book. A love letter to R&B, youth, and the unforgettable agonies of one’s first love. The emotional truth of this indelibly portrayed family and their messy lives will leave you weeping and shattered. I will read everything Patel writes from here on.

    Susie Yang, New York Times bestselling author of WHITE IVY
  • Reading this book is like being sucked into another family. I found myself so invested in each of the characters and their happiness. This family made me laugh, they made me reminisce about my own youth and they made me reflect on my own family. One of the best and most beautiful novels I’ve read all year.

    Luan Goldie, author of NIGHTINGALE POINT
  • Effortlessly written; tender, irreverent and compassionate when dealing with complex themes of guilt, shame, otherness and family relationships. It made me laugh and cry.

    Kavita Puri, author of PARTITION VOICES

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