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When Mr Dog Bites by Brian Conaghan

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When Mr Dog Bites

Narrator
Julian Elfer
Publisher
Bloomsbury Publishing
Publish Date
20 August 2026
Run Time
7 hours 20 minutes
Format
Audiobook

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What to expect

Bloomsbury presents When Mr Dog Bites by Brian Conaghan, read by Julian Elfer

Dylan Mint has Tourette’s. His life is a constant battle to keep the bad stuff in – the swearing, the tics, the howling dog that seems to escape whenever he gets stressed. But a routine visit to the hospital changes everything. Overhearing a hushed conversation between the doctor and his mum, Dylan discovers that he’s going to die in March. So he makes a list of things he must do before he dies: first, he wants to have real sex with gorgeous Michelle Malloy; second, he’s got to find his autistic best friend Amir a new best bud; third, he’s got to get his dad back home from the army so they can say goodbye properly. It’s not a long list, but it’s ambitious, and he doesn’t have much time. Sometimes you’ve just got to go for it – no holding back – and see what happens . . .

Brian Conaghan makes you travel every step of the way in Dylan’s shoes, laughing and crying – often at the same time – as Dylan faces the twists and turns of an unfair world with glorious optimism and wit, raising important questions of inclusion, marginalisation and neurodiversity with sensitivity and insight. This barnstorming debut was shortlisted for the prestigious Carnegie Medal, and Brian has gone on to write many stunning, award-winning novels for teens and younger readers, including the Costa-winning The Bombs that Brought Us Together.

Critics Review

  • It’s the F-word – funny, foul-mouthed, fantastic!

    Charlie Higson

  • I loved Dylan Mint. He made me laugh out loud and his tenacity had me rooting for him from the first page

    Stephen Kelman

  • So surprising and charming it would be hard not to feel a little uplifted

    Observer

  • Beautifully observed and hilariously uncomfortable ... Mint has a certain charm, and his mangled language and omnivorous approach to slang suggest a lively, inquiring brain

    Guardian

See more reviews
  • Energetic, confident and compassionate ... There’s a genuine exuberance about it ... [Conaghan] is one to watch

    Scotland on Sunday

  • Entertaining

    Big Issue

  • One of the book’s most engaging characteristics, its often hilarious (and often scatological) humour … This is a portrayal of young male bonding, complete with all the lively banter of true camaraderie, at its most tender and affectionate

    Irish Times

  • Hilarious

    Stylist

User Reviews

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Details

Author
Brian Conaghan
Narrator
Julian Elfer
Duration
7 hours 20 minutes
Release Date
20 August 2026
ISBN
9781037211508
Format
Audiobook
Publisher
Bloomsbury Publishing
Genre
Children’s / Teenage fiction: Family and home stories, Children’s / Teenage fiction: Relationship stories, Children’s / Teenage personal and social topics: Disability, impairments and special needs

Synopsis

Bloomsbury presents When Mr Dog Bites by Brian Conaghan, read by Julian ElferDylan Mint has Tourette’s. His life is a constant battle to keep the bad stuff in – the swearing, the tics, the howling dog that seems to escape whenever he gets stressed. But a routine visit to the hospital changes everything. Overhearing a hushed conversation between the doctor and his mum, Dylan discovers that he’s going to die in March. So he makes a list of things he must do before he dies: first, he wants to have real sex with gorgeous Michelle Malloy; second, he’s got to find his autistic best friend Amir a new best bud; third, he’s got to get his dad back home from the army so they can say goodbye properly. It’s not a long list, but it’s ambitious, and he doesn’t have much time. Sometimes you’ve just got to go for it – no holding back – and see what happens . . .Brian Conaghan makes you travel every step of the way in Dylan’s shoes, laughing and crying – often at the same time – as Dylan faces the twists and turns of an unfair world with glorious optimism and wit, raising important questions of inclusion, marginalisation and neurodiversity with sensitivity and insight. This barnstorming debut was shortlisted for the prestigious Carnegie Medal, and Brian has gone on to write many stunning, award-winning novels for teens and younger readers, including the Costa-winning The Bombs that Brought Us Together.

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