This is Not a Pity Memoir

Author Abi Morgan
Narrator Fiona Button
Publisher John Murray Press
Run Time 7 hours and 44 minutes
Format Audio
Genre Coping with chronic or long-term illness or conditions, Dating, relationships, living together and marriage: advice and issues, Memoirs.

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What to expect

An ordinary day.
The end of ordinary life.

One morning in June, Abi had her to-do list - drop the kids to school, get coffee and go to work. Jacob had a bad headache so she added 'pick up steroids'. She returned home and found the man she loved and fought and laughed with for twenty years lying on the bathroom floor.

And nothing would ever be the same again.

But this is not a pity memoir. It's about meeting your person. And crazed late night Google trawls. It's about the things you wished you'd said to the person that matters then wildly over-sharing with the barista who doesn't know you at all. It's about sushi and the wrong shoes and the moments you want to shout 'cut'. It's about the silence when you are lost in space and the importance of family and parties and noise.

It's the difference between surviving and living.
It's a reminder that, even in the worst times, there is light ahead.

It's a love story.

(P) 2022 Hodder & Stoughton Limited

Critics Review

Took my breath away. . . I sobbed and laughed and then sobbed again. I think it puts life into perspective but also, by being a love story, it defies many of the norms. Morgan’s unique voice rings out and she is a great companion throughout
I-paper, Books of the Year
Extraordinary…utterly compelling and so honestly told
Nigella Lawson
Every once in a while, a book comes along that causes me to undergo a genuine shift in perspective. Abi Morgan’s This is Not a Pity Memoir had exactly this effect . . . heart breaking, profound and even funny
Spectator
Both very funny and as propulsive as a thriller…impossible to put down.
Observer
There is not a trace of self-pity in Abi Morgan’s heartbreaking memoir . . . full of humour, urgency and pathos, written in a staggeringly frank, intimate voice
Independent
Uplifting and powerful…highly recommended
Woman's Weekly
Compelling . . . mordant humour and heart-warming beauty
Irish Independent
This Is Not a Pity Memoir . . . hurtles along poetically, while managing to be funny and ultimately full of hope
Independent
With her trademark deadpan, trenchant wit, and a deeply soulful mindfulness, Abi Morgan takes a breathtaking hike on the cliff edge of a life upended by illness. By turns harrowing, cracking sharp and heartbreaking, it is comforting to accompany someone with her sense of humor and the absurd on this trip – this book is a gift to anyone who has been similarly unmoored by fate and the furies
MERYL STREEP
Very moving but never sentimental, tough but never cynical . . . gripping, funny and always honest
DAVID NICHOLLS
Truly breathtaking. Arrestingly honest, funny, profound and exquisitely written. I could not have loved it more
CAREY MULLIGAN
I wept. I laughed. I dared to hope. I felt my heart crack. This book is life. It is exceptional
SAM BAKER
The kind of book you will find yourself saying urgently, over and over, to friends: ‘Have you read it?’
CAITLIN MORAN
An extraordinary story told extraordinarily well. I don’t know how Abi Morgan has managed to live through all this, let alone write such a fascinating, heartbreaking yet frequently funny book about it. It is so gripping I honestly couldn’t put it down
MARINA HYDE
Funny and brutally honest . . . an absolute insight for those of us lucky enough to never know life like this
PANDORA SYKES
Incredibly powerful, moving, funny, honest & brave. I LOVED it
EDITH BOWMAN
A mash-up of all the things I love in a book – honesty, comedy, pathos and what-happens-next. It’s brutal – in a good way – but above all else it’s a testament to kindness, stickability and enduring love
KIT DE WAAL
A very moving and utterly absorbing story told with the surgical skill of the brilliant scriptwriter she is
ALEXANDRA SHULMAN
A sharp, poignant and witty joy to read that will leave you energised and uplifted
CELIA WALDEN
Astonishing, terrifying, heartbreaking… as well as grief and fear, there is humour, tenderness and so much love
Daily Express
Told with brutal honesty and a heroic amount of humour . . compelling
Radio Times
Heart-breaking but life affirming and soul-stirring . . . Told with a candid honesty and humour . . . a touching love story and a testament to the human spirit, family and friendship
SARRA MANNING, Red
Uplifting and powerful
Woman and Home
Captivating and compelling
Daily Express
A heartbreaking but hopeful read that will resonate with anyone who has had to cope with a loved one’s illness
Chic, supplement to the Irish Daily Star
A touching love story and a testament to the human spirit, family and friendship
Red Online
I really recommend that book
Fortunately... with Fi and Jane (BBC Radio 4 podcast)
Funny, moving and thought-provoking. It’s a love story, but not as you know it
Bryony Gordon
Award-winning screenwriter Abi Morgan’s account of how she effectively lost her husband to a terrible brain injury is full of heart yet simultaneously unsentimental
Business Post
True to the book’s title, [Abi is] a born storyteller sharing an extraordinary human tale in all its complexity, heartbreak and humour
Cardiff Western Mail
An extraordinary book . . . uplifting and life-affirming. It’s billed as a love story and this is exactly what it is
Daily Mail
My book of the year absolutely has to be screenwriter Abi Morgan’s heart-wrenching memoir. This Is Not A Pity Memoiris an unputdownable story of tragedy, loss, love, grief, transformation and survival. When Abi’s husband Jake was taken ill and put into a coma for months, she thought that was the worst that could happen to their family… then he woke up and a whole new series of unimaginably painful challenges presented themselves. It will make you sob, it will make you laugh, it will break your heart and then it will put it back together again. I promise. I’ve already bought this book several times. I fully expect to buy it several times more’
Sam Baker
This is the mediation on love and grief that we all need to read
The Skinny, Books of the Year

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